If you had the chance…

…to ask how you would die, would you ask that question? Tough one, huh. Disclaimer: this is not meant to be a morbid post. I am in a very good mental state right now. Just sharing my curiosity and thoughts.

I asked that question yesterday at my oncology appointment. It was a question out of curiosity as I cannot wrap my head around how this cancer can get me. In my small, finite mind, I had an answer for everything. If it gets to the liver, either do a radiofrequency ablation procedure or surgically remove some of the liver, it will grow back. If it gets to the lungs, take out a lobe of the lung. If it gets to the lymph system, hhmmnnn, not sure about that one.

So, here is the answer my oncologist gave me. First, he corrected me on my two year prognosis. For the second time in eight months, he has told me that these are just averages and that he has many patients out five and seven years. Then he went on to say that there is not a real defining moment in the process. Basically, he said that cancer takes its toll on the body and the body begins to shut down. It can really no longer fight and so it starts the process of shutting down. He went on to say that many of his patients know it is their time before he does.

So, if we keep fighting and keep the cancer at bay, and I continue to keep the positive attitude, maybe I can keep my body from shutting down for a few more decades. Gonna be a battle, but I don’t lose very many things!! Watch out cancer, here I come! Are you ready to RUMBLE!!!!!!!!!

Also, a small bit of good news yesterday. I gained three more pounds the last two weeks. I am now out of my old high school weight and getting back into my college weight. I have gained back a total of 10 pounds and only have 28 more pounds to gain to get back to my fighting weight!

The Journey Continues…

Well, even though I have been recovering from surgery, this time has been a nice reprieve from this disease. However, the battle must continue.

I had a CT scan on this past Thursday. We hope to get the results tomorrow (Monday). The purpose of this CT is to get a baseline of where the cancer is and see the results of the surgery/chemo wash. The biggest thing that I want to see is that the cancer has been contained and that it has not spread to a major organ. I will post an update when I get the results.

The next step in our journey is to begin chemo again tomorrow (Monday). I see my oncologist at 10:30 and should begin my chemo treatment around 11am. It should last until about 2pm or so. Then I come home and have a home health nurse connect me to my chemo pump again. I really hate that pump. It is a constant reminder, for two days, that there is something wrong with me. Many would say that there are many things wrong with me, but that is another discussion for another day.

Anyway, I get new drugs in my chemo cocktail tomorrow, and I am nervous as to how my body will respond. So I need my prayer support to be strong, again, tomorrow. The mental battles begin again tomorrow and the physical battle continues. I will have chemo treatments for about three months and then have a short reprieve before a second surgery that will probably be scheduled for late April.

Here we go again!! Just remember…

Second opinion…

This Monday, September 10th, Sandi and I have an appointment with a physician at the James Cancer Hospital that is affiliated with Ohio State University.  We are not looking for a new diagnosis, I have what I have.  We are looking for a second opinion on my treatment plan.

Don’t get me wrong, we like the oncologist that we are with and he is giving me the most aggressive chemo treatments available.  We are looking at the James because they are a major cancer research center and they know and are creating cutting edge treatments.  Our current oncologist has even encouraged us to look around at other alternatives.  He knows the physicians at the James and has nothing but great things to say about the physician we are seeing.

Pray that we will have a good visit with the physician. Pray that we may find more aggressive treatments.  Pray that whatever we may be told or learn about on Monday, that Sandi and I will have peace about it. 

Also pray for me as I mentally prepare for round #4 of chemo that will be coming up next week.  Also pray for me and my weight management.  I am continuing to loose weight and I cannot afford to lose anymore.  I was 182 lbs. in early June.  My weigh in at the hospital when this all started was 172 lbs.  Last weigh in was 156 lbs.  I am to be consuming 2600 to 3000 calories per day, but I am tired of eating, to be honest.  Hopefully this will help all of you be able to pray more specifically over the next couple of weeks.

Chemo Treatment 1…

Well, after my small breakdown last night, I am happy to report that today was a great day! My first treatment at my oncologist’s office was really a non-event, no biggie. I am thankful for that. They loaded me up with some meds to ward off the evils of any sickness they may try to creep in early. Three hours later, my IV meds were in me and we were out of there. Just a side note that the nurses we had today were FANTASTIC!! Top notch in every aspect of my visit. That really helped to set the tone for our first visit.

Shortly after our arrival home, we were met by our home health nurse and our goodie bag of drugs, kits, pumps, whatever. Thirty minutes later, I was connected to my pump and it will be my best friend for the next two days. 4800 mgs of 5Fu will be flowing through my body and killing every cancer cell that it can find.

Right now, about 8+ hours into my treatment, I feel great. They say the side affects may start to set in tomorrow or Thursday, but I have my supply of meds to combat them and will push through it.

I will say, thank you again, for the prayers. I felt the peace and grace of God around me today as I was never anxious, scared, or in pain for this first treatment. I do know that the next few days may not be perfect, but the start of my chemo has been a positive event so far.

So, stay tuned, as we march forward!!

Visit with the Oncologist…

Well, we had quite a visit the other day. Way too much info thrown at us that included drugs, tests, dates, etc., but we are on it!! So here is a quick update on the last two days.

Saw the oncologist yesterday. We have chosen to start with chemo to stop the spreading and shrink the tumor. We are at peace that chemo is the way to go at this time. The cool thing is that I get to talk about cocktails and they are medically necessary!!! My chemo cocktail will consist of Oxaliplatin (with 5FU), Leucovorin and Avastin. The whole mix is called Modified FOLFOX6. My chemo treatments will start next Tuesday, July 31st. They will consist of about a three hour treatment at the oncologist’s office. Upon my arrival home from treatment, I will be met by a home health nurse who will hook me up to a pump. I will be on a chemo pump for 48 hours. This cycle will continue every two weeks.

Today, I had my port put in. This is a device that has been implanted in the left side of my chest and will be used to administer my chemo. It will be there for the endurance of my journey and will be removed when I win. Monday, I will be getting a PET/CT scan. The results of this scan will confirm the stage of my cancer and will also show us more definitively, where this has spread.

Sandi and I are doing well. Things are moving fast and we are ok with that. The faster I can get some drugs on board, the faster this stupid thing starts to shrink!!!!

The next prayer request we have is that either tonight or tomorrow, we will be sharing this illness with our kids. They need to know and need to know very soon as my treatments begin next week. Please pray that Sandi and I will have the words to speak and that they will understand and not be afraid.

TO GOD BE ALL THE GLORY!! AMEN!!!!!